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Boomstick
Boomstick, known in real life as Chad James, is a presenter of Death Battle alongside Wiz. Being the "funny man" of the duo, he's usually the one providing the comedy relief and making (usually inapropritate) jokes, and noting how hot several of the women competetors are. He still does help with giving information on the fighters being a "Weapons Expert" of sorts. Quotes *''He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.'' (starting of most episodes) *''IT'S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLE!'' (beginning every match) *''Man, I'm going to totally name my first kid that.'' (on Akuma's Raging Demon) *''...I'm sorry, what? I was distracted.'' (when distracted by Mai's outfit.) *''Man, that really would of helped to get that last beer all those times... probably still be married.'' (when discussing Link's hookshot) *''That belt has pretty much everything, grappling hook, explosives, beer... maybe not that last one, but mine would.'' (when discussing Batman's Utility Belt) *''Y'know, I always wanted to eat a Pokémon. What?! They look delicious!'' (after Pikachu vs Blanka, seeing Blanka ate Pikachu.) *''GIMME GIMME GIMME GIMME!'' (when Battlecat is revealed to be half-tiger, half-dragon) *''And he traded blows with Superman. You know, that one guy who can lift entire planets and maybe killed your favorite person ever.'' That one. (analysing He-Man) *''Aww, we missed the cute kitty stage! SHUT UP, kittens are adorable!'' (during Lion-O's bio at He-Man vs Lion-O) *''...Which is perfect for when you're on the couch! Sword of Omens, give me snacks beyond snacks...and a beer!'' (When discussing the Sword of Omens' Tractor Beam) *''I now know the way I want to die.'' (on Orchid's Heart Attack No Mercy) *''Like a real man... fox. Fox-man!'' (Fox VS Bucky aftermath) *''Ha ha, I get it! MILES PR OWER! Creativity like that is why Sega's still making consoles.'' (In response to Tails' real name) *''Did a turtle get really drunk one night and then come across a tank and was like "Eh, I'll put my dick in that!" Then 9 months later the tank showed up at his door and was like "BOOM, this is your's." Then he raised it out of shame until one day it evolved and all the other turtles were like "THAT'S FUCKING AWESOME!" So then they all started banging tanks?!'' (about Blastoise) *''And why can't my turtle do that? Some day, Mr. Snappy. Some day...'' (when Gamera flies) *''I could survive a fall out of an airplane, but I wouldn't bet on it... unless you're doing it Wiz. You should totally try it. 5 bucks if you make it.'' (on Captain America surviving the fall from an airplane) *''While cats are clearly inferior to dogs, I might make an exception with this one and take it home.'' (during Tigerzord's analysis) *''I told him not to move! (when he asked Wiz to play that knife finger stabby game during Tigerzord's analysis) *''Oh, I have an awesome giant Gundam that everyone needs to do awesome stuff. Poor me. ''(when Zechs feels weak.) *"AND DIARRHEA JOKE FOOT"?! HAHAHAHA! What does it do?! Kick people in the stomach so hard that he takes them to Brown Town? (after typing Joudan Sokutogeri on Google Translate) * ''Well my shirt is made up of "Boomstick-ium". See? I can make up alloys too, writers. (on Deathstroke's armor) *''There's Mike Kirby, who singing talent is apparently so awful, everything that hears it dies. Like Wiz at karaoke night with the ladies.'' (on Kirby's Mike form while also poking fun at Wizard) *''Well F-U-C-K SPACE, Y-O-U!! I'M OUT!!'' (When he was confused about the name Guilty Gear's main villain "That Man") *''I wanna fire seal, that'd be fuckin' sweet. Try and eat me now, orca whale. Fire seal!'' (on Sol Badguy's Fire Seal) *''She knows when I've lied AND where I've been? Women should not have these powers. '' (on Toph's Seismic Sense) *''So... does she like... now have a bad habit of pecking at food and shitting on peoples' cars?'' (on Samus Aran being infused with Chozo DNA) *''Yeah, because we all know how many times you scare a bird in the parking lot and then it just curls up into a ball and zooms away!'' (after Wizard replies, "Bird DNA") *''Fun fact: Every year following his escape, Boba Fett returns to the planet Tattooine just to shoot the Sarlacc. In his spaceship. From orbit. He's learned his lesson, he's staying as far away from that shit as he possibly can.'' (on Boba Fett falling into the Sarlacc Pit) *''Yeah, when one gains the power of flying-ness? Duh.'' (after Wizard is puzzled by the phrase "fly-ier" to describe Night Terror, the ultimate form of Nightmare) *''Wiz, if that ever happens to me do me a solid and kill yourself in front of me so that my dream of outliving you is complete!'' (on Lex refusing Superman's help, even when he's in a critical situation.) Post-Match Puns *''She sure stopped Fett cold!'' *''Looks like Tsung's all "souled out". Ha-hah! Get it, Wiz?'' *''Rogue sure made out in this fight.'' *''You might say this battle really heated up in the end.'' *'''Gief just found his window of opportunity.'' *''Looks like Leo got the point in this battle.'' *''In the end, Zitz just needed to pull himself together.'' *''Smart as he may be, Riptor just didn't have the stomach for this dino-mite, dino-fight.'' *''Felicia just took her final meow.'' *''Now, that was one hell of a fight!'' *''Bomberman sure went out with a bang.'' *''Looks like Shadow's time was up.'' *''Looks like Mario just couldn't keep up.'' *''This fight really popped! Y... you know 'cause... they're pop stars and... they blew up...'' *''Those other shirts were sure cotton off guard!'' *''Which forced Harry to lose the battle.'' *''Chun-Li's never looked "hotter".'' *''She put the "pwn" in "pony".'' * ''This fight'''' was nuts! (laughs) ''- Master Chief teabags Doomguy in the end of the fight. *''Peach sure fleeced Zelda in this fight.'' *''Well, at least Raiden finally found his place in the sun.'' *''Cloud should've had his mind on more than just the Master Sword!'' *''And all of Wayne's money and the commissioner's men, couldn't put Batman together again.'' *''Everything was going well until Pikachu lost his head.'' *''Goku just Kaio-can't keep up with the Man of Steel.'' *''See, and you all thought you'd never see He-Man pound a pussy!'' *''Shao Kahn sure had a final soul-ution for Bison.'' *''Looks like Strider just floored Hayabusa.'' *''It was a good fight, but in the end, Ivy croaked.'' *''In the end, Bucky choked.'' *''The Terminator almost had a victory. Until it blew up in his face.'' *''Looks like Luigi was outfoxed.'' *''Blastoise H2Owned.'' *''In the end, Sektor got ro-blown up!'' *''Looks like Godzilla put Gamera through living...Shell'' *''Captain America just couldn't hang in there.'' *''Stupid future-predicting robot, and its REALLY FUCKING SWEET SWORD! GUNDAMNIT!'' *''Scorpion was just too hot to handle.'' *''Deadpool was just a cut above the rest.'' *''''Buu'' just couldn't stomach this fight.'' *''Ragna just burned out in the end.'' *''Gaara couldn't sand up to Toph. Ahaha! I know you're floored. I really ground that one in, didn't I? What can I say, it's my Earthly Delight. No need to gravel about it, can't we just bury the hatchet? I'm out.'' *''Fett just couldn't keep his head in the game.'' *''I guess this one just kinda spaced out.'' *''Guts was just a whole other calibur.'' *''Lex just wasn't suited for this battle.'' Trivia *Boomstick has mentioned many times that he has an ex-wife. *He has also mentioned that he could or could not have a pirate father who is a zombie at this point. This was clued when Wizard referenced Ivy Valentine's relationship to Cervantes. *He believes that Link is a fairy and that Blastoise is the offspring of drunk turtles and tanks. *Boomstick seems to really like dinosaurs and thinks kittens are adorable. *In Yoshi vs. Riptor, Boomstick seems to have a pink car with flame detailing on it. *He has expressed sadness when characters he likes loses, such as Mike Haggar, Charizard, and the Tigerzord. *He openly had no faith in Michealangelo and called Venusaur ugly. *He hates tween popstars *When he and Wiz were asked "If the combatant dies, can they ever come back?", Boomstick replies: "Uh, sure. Why not? We have the power to do anything". With Batman returning despite his loss, it turns out to be true. *In Godzilla vs. Gamera. It's mentioned that Boomstick has a pet Turtle named Mr. Snappy, when he wonders why his Turtle can't fly unlike Gamera, but hopes that it will some day. *In Tigerzord vs. Gundam Epyon, Boomstick claims that nothing is cooler than giant fighting robots, he also claims that "Cats are clearly inferior to Dogs", but immediately afterwards claims that he would make an exception for Tigerzord. *In Screwattack's Top 10 Boomsticks with Death Battle's Boomstick Boomstick reveals that the Super Shotgun from Doom 2 is the same one he uses as his right leg. Category:Real World